Alice Lily Virchow

Alice Lily Virchow, born February 8, 2014, at 4:47pm

There's so much to say that it's overwhelmed me to even initiate writing this post--this post that I wasn't sure I'd ever get to write, this post that confirms the reality of what I see just five feet from me, sleeping happily in her bouncy chair. If I let myself delve into the overwhelming emotions of the first three weeks with our daughter, though, I might never get this written, so I'll simply stick to the basics--for now.

Lily arrived with the headstrong, stubborn, "I'm going to do this my way" attitude that confirms she is most definitely my daughter! Despite Jeff and my certainty that she'd arrive late (we had our money on Tuesday, February 18), Lily had other plans in mind. After a full day of work (including my regular afternoon workout at school) and a date night with Jeff at our favorite Irish pub, my water broke six days early in grand (and flood-like) fashion at home on Friday, February 7. That night and the next day were largely a blur of "hurry up and wait"; we watched a lot of Olympic figure skating, dozed intermittently, and chatted (in disbelief) about the imminent arrival of our daughter. However, when our doctor came in at 3:45pm Saturday to discuss the possibility of an immediate c-section (due to 18 hours of non-progressive labor and some scary episodes where Lily's heart rate decreased dramatically on the monitors), the reality that Lily was really coming--NOW--set in. And in spite of my tears and worries, Jeff did what he always does so well: he wrapped his arms around me (and a whole lot of tubes and monitors!) and whispered quiet words of reassurance in my ear as he prayed for the three of us.

Just an hour later, Lily was in our arms. And I finally saw the sight I have dreamed of for three years, the sight that kept me going through expensive infertility treatments, the sight that let me cling to hope after we lost first Blueberry and then Beanster, the sight that tells me God is faithful and tiny miracles do exist.

There are no words to describe the moment Jeff became the father of his little girl. It overwhelmed me exactly as I expected it would, and it continues to do so daily, as I watch him with his daughter--as he sings to her, as he rocks her to sleep, as he gently takes her out of my exhausted arms at the end of the day and soothes her quietly.

Lily is already turning us into the best versions of ourselves--the ones where the focus can no longer be on us but needs to be on the support and encouragement of each other as we care for our tiny daughter. We are certainly imperfect parents, but we know--with certainty--that our Father believes we are the perfect parents for Lily. And that is an honor greater than any other we have ever received.

Sweet Alice Lily, welcome to the world.

A Full-Term Button Parade!

Okay, I'm a little (too?) excited about this week's post, mostly because I've been waiting to do it for about 8 months. Since our first weekly bump photo at 12 weeks (before hardly anyone even knew about Button), I've been keeping an album on my phone that has one photo from each week. Looking at them has been a way of reminding myself how far we've come, and it's also reminded me to laugh at myself (especially when I realize how "big" I thought I was at 17 weeks!). So, even though weekly posts since the summer have let you see most of these photos already, I hope you'll indulge this little celebratory walk through the last several months.

Before we begin, though, there's something you should know. You might notice that, in many of these photos, I'm wearing the same necklace. Last May, on Mother's Day, it was opening weekend for the production of Twelfth Night in which I was playing Viola. As we drove back home from the Sunday matinee, Jeff stopped off at his theatre to retrieve a package. What he handed me when he got back in the car was a simple brown envelope; he hadn't had time to wrap it, but he wanted me to have it on the very day that I had been dreading so much--the day that reminded me I already was a mom but that my sweet angels, Blueberry and Beanster, live in heaven, not on earth.

What was inside that simple package made me love the father of my little ones more than I ever had before.

Designed in collaboration with Jeff by an artist we know in California, the necklace has Blueberry and Beanster safely nestled in angel's wings, crowned by the halo that we know they wear. I love it because our two little ones are not lonely or scared--they are snuggled together and held fast by the greatest Father we know--and their daddy's love for them is what inspired it. I wear it nearly every day, knowing that they watch over the growth of their little sister, Button, knowing that she will hear about them one day.

So, now that you know that today's parade includes all three of our little ones, away we go!

And so we arrive at 39 weeks. With full hearts, with a little Blueberry and a little Beanster watching over their little sister, with a nursery overflowing with love that awaits Button's arrival.

Thank you for being on this journey with us.